What the hell is wrong with my eggs?

I am not a religious person. 

At. All.

But I do have some nice Easter memories. My mom, my sister and I would sit any dye eggs for an afternoon. My mom is a KSU Wildcats freak, and she always wanted her purple egg to be pretty. She would stick her egg in the purple and leave it forever and ever. My sister and I were always to impatient and have really some pastel looking eggs at the end of the day. My mom would have a few vibrant, dark, just gorgeous eggs and Sister and I would solemnly vow that next year, we would be patient and have pretty eggs like Mom. Then we would repeat the process the next year. Good times. 

Well, I'm the mom now. So I decided to channel my mother and leave my eggs in for a long time and have all the pretty eggs. I carefully followed the instructions to make the dye - choosing vinegar since it promised the darkest eggs - and then carefully lowered my eggs in and let them sit forever. 

Holy crap. Am I ever disappointed. Here are my sad, sad eggs. 

What the hell man? I mean, the colors are ok - but they are splotchy with weird specks all over them. And the purple isn't even hardly purple - its blue and pink-ish. I was so sad! 

Ugly. 

I was actually kind of impressed that this one ended up look like a sun. It was absolutely not planned. 

I am not even sure how this is possible. Actually - yes I do. Aliens. The aliens did it. They are trying to tell me something. 

I called my mom to complain and ask her what the secret to the pretty eggs is. She told me that her eggs look like crap now, too. She says the dye is super cheap and they just look bad. 

Bummer.