There is a Toenail in the Tub

I was bathing the dachshunds in my tub the other day - and Delano pulled his usual frantic "ESCAPE! THIS WATER IS ACTUALLY ACID AND IS BURNING ALL OF MY SKIN OFF! I'M DYYYIIINGGG!!!!" routine.

I wrapped him up in a towel and started drying, turned around the grab the shampoo from the tub and there was a toenail laying in the bottom of the tub. I believe my brain said "Ho-ly Shit." I began frantically checking dachshund toes - even though I was 99 percent sure that it was Delano - Bean doesn't act like a spaz like Delano does.

Sure enough - there is a toenail missing from one of Delano's back feet. Shit. Blood freaking everywhere. We call the vet - to see what we should do - and the lady at the vet office said they were just "slammed with emergencies." If we wanted Delano seen - it would be a while.

I worked as a vet-tech a couple years ago - so I asked if there was anything that I could do. She said that all that they would really do was stop the bleeding, remove any extra nail if he didn't get it all off, and that is it. If he wouldn't leave it alone - he would have to wear one of those lovely cones so he didn't bug it.

Well - I happen to have one of those crazy collars and blood doesn't scare me or anything - so I sat cross-legged on the deck, with a shaking dog on my lap until the bleeding slowed. We tried to bandage it twice, but he walked out of it - so that was shot. And he would not stop licking it - so he is wearing a beautiful cone on his head. Which he is terrified of.

Here is the thing about Delano. He is terrified of his own shadow. Too much attention makes him piddle. He hides under the bed or behind the couch a lot. He prefers for you to rub him with your feet - because hands are just too much attention. It took him months to figure out that glass was, in fact, solid. he is the sweetest damn dog, but not so bright.

Now our house is filled with the sounds of the cone bouncing off the walls, Delano yipping when he moves wrong, and Pants squealing happily chasing an impaired Delano around. Delano could just just hop up on the couch where he is safe - but he is scared - because of the cone - so he doesn't.

It is going to be a long couple of days for that poor dog.