Its MY relationship....

My husband is one of 4 children. He has an older sister and two younger brothers. TJ's brother, Sean, is just a couple years younger than him. Sean and my friend, Ann, have always had a flirtation, and have hooked up on occasion.  We never thought anything would really come of it, they are more than 4 years apart, Sean really liked hooking up with anything that walked, Ann wants to get married and have babies...like yesterday.

A few months ago, Ann and Sean decided to give it a go. They have been dating for almost 8 months, and now live together. I am happy they are happy - BUT -

QUIT FUCKING COMPARING MY RELATIONSHIP TO YOURS!

Yes, I am yelling.

I know that we are all incredibly close. Ann and I have been best friends going on 15 years now. Outside of my husband and baby, there is not a person I know better or care about more than her. We are absolute staples in each others lives. TJ and Sean enjoy almost all of the same things, and I have to ask TJ not to make plans with Sean every single day on the weekends. Because, you know, his wife and son may want to spend some time with him.

That said, Sean and I would never have worked out. We are both waaayyyy too stubborn. He has incredibly traditional views on how a relationship should work, which immediately makes me turn all "I am woman, hear me roar".  (I am stong, STRONG, I am invincible, INVINCIBLE, I am woman...oooooooooo).  TJ and Ann also do not see eye-to-eye.  They both are big worries, and very particular. Neither one of them is gifted at getting over their own stuff for the benefit of others.  Which is pretty funny because they both think they are great at it.

We all know all of this about each other.  Still, for some crazy reason, every tiny thing that TJ and I do, I have to hear about "why isnt that happening with us?".  "He didn't call me....TJ called you?" "When you fight does TJ <insert whatever odd thing Sean did here>.  And whenever I get my answers to these questions, Ann quickly says to Sean, "Well, Gentry and TJ do this!" and then they fight about why its not going to work.

Ann (not your real name) I hope one day, you read this.  And I hope you go "Hmmm, Ann, thats my middle name. Sean is his middle name.  I bet she is talking about us. Damn. SEAN, GET IN HERE, GENTRY WROTE ABOUT US ON A BLOG!" Good - now that I have you both here -

QUIT FUCKING COMPARING MY RELATIONSHIP TO YOURS!!

Yup, it was so important I yelled it twice.

Look, TJ and I have a 7 year head start on you guys, we are married, we have a kid. We have been through cross country moves, family deaths, weddings, and almost a decades worth of holidays and memories.  We have a system together that works so well, we bicker like nobody's business, but we hardly ever fight.  And we all know what works for us, and our temperaments would never, ever be what works for you guys. So I don't want to hear a comparison every time any teeny thing happens. There is no comparison - they are two completely separate entities that have no effect on each other what so ever.

I say this because I love you, and I don't want to have to kick you both in the shins.


*Edited to add* P.S- For the last 6 months, the baby has gone to bed at 7:30.  This has happened every time you come to visit, when I come visit you, whenever we talk, etc.  So when you ONLY call at 7:30 - you can't get mad that I don't *ever* talk to you.  Just sayin'. .